gapingvoid: "cartoons drawn on the back of business cards"

cluechained

Brian Moffat left a hilarious comment on my recent "Hughtrain For Hire" post:

If a company is clued in they won't need you.

If they're clueless, they won't want you.

You need the half-clued.

And if you're half good, they'll be clued-in quick.

So, yeah raise your fee by half. 15K. Work with no client for no more than three months. 5K per. Clued-in in 90 days or fuck off and die.

Plus eliminate the phone calls. NONE! Unless you plan on recording them, for quality or fucking amazement purposes.

Keep it all in text/wikis. Pressures people to think. Hold all meetings,when and if and only when necessary, at a zoo or an art gallery.

Other than that, I haven't got a fucking clue what you're talking about, to be honest about it, other than understanding that people are basically psychotic, so there's a basis for a conversation there, I suppose, but I really don't want to have a conversation about the shit I buy, and I wouldn't have to if everything thrown on the market wasn't beta quality in the first fucking place. I'd be fucking amazed if everyone stopped presuming that I want a relationship. I don't. Any more than I want messages. I want anonymous sex. No talking. It's always amazing and renews my faith in our species more than any product and or service, and if you and the business model Train set don't get this, call me and we'll talk.

[NOTE TO SELF:] Writing about marketing without losing all self-respect is harder than it looks.

[NOTE TO SELF:] The more I understand markets, the less I want to be in them.

Posted by hugh macleod at December 20, 2004 11:15 AM | TrackBack